Personal Stories of Recovery
Gambling addiction has affected millions of people worldwide, often leading to a cycle of despair that seems impossible to break. However, recovery is entirely possible and has been demonstrated by countless individuals who have overcome their addiction. These stories of recovery serve as powerful reminders that hope and healing are within reach. If you or someone you know is battling a gambling addiction, remember that help is available, and a better future is possible.
Connie Paglianiti’s Story
Connie went through a difficult but rewarding journey to recovery from her gambling addiction. As a young girl, growing up in an Italian household, she focused on school and work without much time to have fun. At 18 she started to organize charity events and gained a reputation for being reliable. Despite her successful career and great reputation, she fell into $400,000 of debt due to a business relationship with a con man. She turned to gambling in an attempt to escape her troubles.
“I got into such a depressive state that I turned to gambling for two reasons: one, to see if I could win enough money to get me out of the mess; and two, it was the only place I could forget about my troubles,” she recalls. Over the next four years, she stole over $6 million from one of her long-time clients to cover her debts and fund her gambling habit. She continued her career, but unfortunately, lost large sums of money to another con man she met at a charity event.
Being conned of money for a second time led Connie to spiral. For her, gambling was not just a slight hope of regaining her lost money but it became a familiar outlet for her to take away the pain. In public she put on a happy and confident persona as a successful and trustworthy business woman but in private she felt drained and overwhelmed at the deep holes of debt she had dug out for herself.
In September 2018, Connie was convicted for nine counts of theft and sentenced to 2.5 years in prison. Her husband and son had no idea about her addiction until she was accused. Although she faced one of the most feared punishments, being imprisoned, she took this opportunity to turn her life around. Connie worked as much as possible for $8.95 an hour in prison and made it her priority to redeem herself for her own good and the happiness of her family.
Since her release Connie has been looking for employment. It is very important to her to be open about her past despite the major setback it gives her. The stigma surrounding previous imprisonment is even worse than the stigma around gambling, but Connie believes being honest is the best way to properly live a clean life. She regularly talks to a gambling counselor to discuss the struggles she faces coming out of addiction and prison. She considers herself as “99.9% not a gambler” and feels relieved to live without the weight of a big secret. Despite her massive successes in recovery she is continuing to improve everyday. She now lives by the values of truth and hard work saying, “If you stick with the truth, you can never get caught out."
Sam DeMello’s Story
Sam’s inspiring story toward recovering shows his perseverance and hope while overcoming a gambling addiction that started at a very young age. Sam DeMello is thirty-seven, he grew up in the Bay Area and currently lives in Boston. He works as a tech recruiter and lives with his wife and two kids.
Sam’s addiction started at thirteen, when he was introduced to poker in middle school. He continued his poker habit as an “okay player” throughout middle and high school. He didn’t become serious about poker until college, where he found himself absorbed into the world of poker. He constantly thought about poker rather than school but luckily was still able to graduate college.
Although his poker habit did not become a problem, gambling became a major tension in Sam’s life when he was introduced to sports betting at twenty-four. Unlike poker, sport betting was easily accessible, making it even more tempting for Sam. He describes it as “having a casino in my pocket twenty-four hours a day.” This led to him constantly making and checking his bets, to the point that he would often sneak to the bathroom in the office to place bets. Sam never saw this as a problem, as he felt like he was well off, with a good job, good social life, and success. This made him dismiss any thought that he would’ve been able to get addicted to gambling.
Sam did not fall into a deep hole of debt or find himself depressed, but after a gambling session lost a significant amount of money, he realized how much gambling was consuming his life. After admitting to his uncontrollable compulsions, he decided he needed to get help. He found a therapist to talk to, hoping to find a quick solution to stop his problem, but the journey to recovery is not so simple. His therapist wanted to discuss the root of the problem, talking about his childhood and past trauma, but Sam felt this was not helpful as he lived a relatively privileged childhood. He finally decided to attend a Gamblers Anonymous Meeting, where he tried to open up about his struggles. Although this was a helpful environment, Sam felt that he was not honest enough and failed to create a proper connection with the group in order to have substantial improvements.
His recovery gained momentum when he met his wife. He kept his gambling habits a secret, but it became difficult and tiresome to constantly hide his addiction. After getting engaged, his fiancé started to notice his symptoms. She gave him an ultimatum saying, “OK — either you tell me what’s going on and we can try to address it, or we’re not going to get married.” This was Sam’s big turning point. He finally opened up to his fiancé and decided to commit to recovery. Together they educated themselves on what a gambling addiction is, he gave her control of finances to limit himself, and he blocked gambling apps on his phone. For Sam, learning about the neuroscience behind gambling addiction helped him to understand what he was going through and properly withdraw from his compulsions.
Sam’s life has gotten better than he could ever imagine since he has been in recovery. He lives a good life with his wife and two kids and has even started an app called ‘Evie’ to help others suffering from a gambling addiction. Sam talks about how important it is to accept help from others. He felt undeserving of support but admits that accepting it was the most important thing to help him recover. Sam’s story shows how recovery is never something you have to go through alone. Admitting the problem, reaching out, and accepting support is the best thing you can do to help yourself through recovery.
Nathan’s Story
Nathan got through his gambling addiction despite his discouraging surroundings and family history. Nathan grew up in a family of criminals and addicts which led him to start drinking and taking drugs at the young age of 14. Nathan quickly fell into a gambling habit. As early as primary school, Nathan began showing signs of gambling. He would play a game in which kids would throw coins against a wall and whoever owned the coin that landed closest to the wall collected everybody else’s. He would use his lunch money to play this game and it became routine, sometimes he would lose his money and go without lunch for the day.
As he became older he would place small bets on sports but gambling did not become a big problem until he turned 18 and started going to the pub. He put a very small amount of money into the card machine and scored a “royal flush.” The feeling Nathan got with this first big win was one he continued to chase. As he began to gamble more he picked up the habit of “borrowing money without the intention of giving it back.”
Gambling became routine and not necessarily something Nathan wanted to do. He even recalls “those times when I was gambling and feeling a desperate desire to lose. Because I knew that the more I won, the longer I was going to be there.” Gambling drew him in and it became a nagging itch he couldn’t resist. He recounts being unable to stand at the bar venue without gambling, he had to be actively gambling and would often not even check if he won or lost.
On December 23, 2016, after a heavy drinking and gambling spree, Nathan's wife reached her breaking point and asked him to leave. He spent Christmas Eve in a pub, missed his children's gift-opening on Christmas Day, and felt utterly broken. He says, "I made a decision right at that moment that it would be better off for everyone if I was no longer alive, because I couldn’t stop — I’d tried everything.”
Nathan had hit a low point, but luckily, he came across a radio ad for an addiction recovery practice. Initially, Nathan hoped to learn to gamble responsibly, but he realized he needed to address his alcohol and drug issues as well. After having meetings with a psychiatrist he embraced recovery fully and learned that complete abstinence was the only way to manage his addictions. Today, Nathan works as a counselor to help others. He credits his addiction treatment center with saving his life and offers hope to others, showing that recovery is possible with the right support. He says, "If I hadn’t walked through those doors, I would be underground today," highlighting the power of seeking help.
Conclusion
These stories of recovery from gambling addiction highlight that change is possible, even from the darkest places. Connie, Sam, and Nathan found their paths to healing by seeking help, embracing honesty, and committing to change. Their journeys demonstrate that with support and determination, recovery is within reach for anyone struggling with addiction. Don’t hesitate to reach out, as taking that first step can lead to a life free from gambling addiction.
BIBLIOGRAPHY
Paglianiti, Connie . 2023. “Connie’s Story.” Gambler’s Help. May 11, 2023. https://gamblershelp.com.au/learn-about-gambling/personal-stories/connie/.
Huble, Cait. 2024. “Every Story Matters: Sam.” National Council on Problem Gambling. March 15, 2024. https://www.ncpgambling.org/news/every-story-matters-sam/.
Nathan. 2023. “Nathan’s Story.” South Pacific Private. October 10, 2023. https://www.southpacificprivate.com.au/our-blog/addiction-rehab/gambling-addiction/nathans-story/.